How to Overcome Fear of Failure

Fear of failure can result in many setbacks for your personal and professional life. It can stop you from trying, believing in yourself and ultimately succeeding when it comes to your big dreams and goals.

Overcoming fear of failure is a process that you will probably have to revisit as you navigate the inevitable hurdles and uncertainties of working toward your goals.

If you are in that stage now where you find yourself questioning everything and lacking the confidence to move forward, there are steps you can take to shift your perspective.

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Push Past Your Fear of Failure by Answering Three Mindful Questions

Accessing the core feelings behind why you might be holding yourself back will have the biggest impact on your motivation to stay the course. There are three questions you can ask yourself to help uncover those emotions that are hard to put into words:

First Question: Are my thoughts rational?

When dealing with anxiety or insecurities, you may have thoughts that feel like they are based in reality when really they are just exaggerations of your concerns about a situation.

It’s important to separate your irrational feelings from your rational thoughts to make progress. You don’t have to beat yourself up over them, just acknowledge them and move on.

Irrational vs Rational

Below are some quick examples of the two different types of thoughts.

Irrational: “Everyone will laugh at me and think I’m stupid.”
Rational: “This idea could cost a lot of time and money without producing any results.”

It can be extra helpful to say these thoughts out loud to a friend that you trust to hear exactly how unbelievable they sound outside of your head. If that’s too uncomfortable then even saying them out loud to yourself can have the same effect.

We can’t predict every problem that will arise and there will definitely be setbacks along the way but once you have a clear understanding of what your rational concerns are you can begin to address them as real problems.

With that in mind you can shift your focus from anxiety and uncertainty to taking action and preparing ahead of time for any foreseeable problems. You can also create back-up plans and exit strategies so that you will be more confident in your ability overcome obstacles, mistakes or accidents.

Second Question: What is the worst case scenario?

Even worse than having irrational thoughts, you may be catastrophizing your fears in your head.

Some examples of these doom-affirming thoughts are “If I start a business I’ll lose everything I’ve worked so hard for and my family and friends will never speak to me again”.

It can sound silly seeing it written out but thoughts like these running as background noise in your head can negatively affect confidence and motivation.

To sort through these thoughts and pinpoint what it is you’re actually worried about (the real fear behind your disaster scenario thoughts) you can ask yourself: What is the worst case scenario to me if this doesn’t work out?

Then narrow it down further to: What is the worst case scenario that is most likely to happen?

Once you have your answer, you’re ready to assess the real risk and see if ultimately your worst case scenario is something that you’re confident you can handle.

Third Question: What events happened in the past that are triggering my fear instinct now?

Any shame and rejection that you felt in the past can still be ingrained in your brain today, making you resistant to try new things as a misguided effort to protect yourself.

There could even be situations and circumstances that have happened to you more recently that you’re still trying to deal with or events from your childhood.

While it’s impossible to make these issues disappear, you can try to find the root cause of this coping mechanism to shut down your fear instinct.

For example if you’ve ever felt embarrassed when speaking on a public platform, that may have triggered a fear of being seen that is making you more hesitant to start a business now.

Or maybe there was a time when you poured all your blood, sweat and tears into a project only to see it crash and burn. That may make you resist the feeling of trying something new again.

If your efforts have ever been overlooked or you’ve been betrayed by someone else claiming credit for your work then you might have feelings of not wanting to try to achieve things anymore.

These are the types of negative experiences from the past that can lead to you holding yourself back now.

If you’re feeling stuck and wondering why you can’t move forward, take some time to reflect and search your memory for any incidents that are causing you to second guess yourself today.

How to Stop Being Afraid of Failure

Fear of failure can be a comfortable trap that prevents us from trying or taking a step forward with the excuse of something terrible waiting for us on the other side. This fear can be the direct result of letting your thoughts run wild without taking the time to see where the root cause lies.

With a little bit of mindfulness and reflection you can come to a better understanding of your internal motivations and gain the confidence to start something new.

You can get started today by eliminating irrational thoughts, planning for realistic setbacks, and acknowledging negative experiences from your past that are causing you to hesitate before doing what you want to do now.